It's a conspiracy!

How's this for a conspiracy theory:
'Bureaucrats imported from draconian southern states are trying to destroy the Northern Territory's unique lifestyle and heritage. They come to Darwin for a few miserable years with no intention of staying or making innovative and intelligent decisions. Their aim is to implement the laws that have already been imposed on states that have no relationship or understanding of our truly unique part of Australia.'
So what's the burning issue? What's the infringement of our civil liberties? What's threatening to destroy our 'unique lifestyle and heritage'?
Never in your wildest dreams would you guess that it's simply a proposal to impose a speed limit on the Stuart Highway, all 1900 kms of road that stretches from Darwin to the South Australian border.
The reason?
We have a road toll that's out of all proportion to our population of 200,000-odd; 34 people (that's 17 in every 100,000) have died on our roads since Jan 1 and countless people have been injured.
Speed and booze are major contributors, but the state of the roads and the skill of drivers play a part too.
The highway has no speed limit outside built-up areas.
Theoretically, you can drive at any speed you like.
The police have a caveat - 'safest' speed - which enables them to prosecute the more outrageous speedsters for dangerous driving.
The Government is now floating the idea that we should have a a maximum speed limit of 11okm/h - just like everywhere else in Australia.
It's probably a requirement for more Commonwealth road funding, which we desperately need, particularly for remote Aboriginal communities.
Surprise surprise there's already a protest website - www.nospeedlimit.com - to complement the outpouring of outrage from the petrolheads.
I had a look at the website today and I have to say it's a professional job, which leads me to believe this isn't just a grassroots effort.
The articles on motor-racing and the puff piece for the new Camry are a dead give away.
Someone's interests are obviously being threatened and it ain't those of the average punter behind the wheel
I couldn't find the above quote verbatim on the site.
That comes courtesy of our Northern Territory News, the daily rag that devotes lots of column inches to crocodile stories and even more to our 'unique lifestyle and heritage'.
I'm taking it to be an accurate quote because the paper is owned by Rupert Murdoch and you can always trust a media baron's local outlets to tell the truth, can't you?
And according to NTN, the site also says that tourists and unlicensed drivers, mostly from Aboriginal communities, contribute more to road deaths than driving at 140km/h on the open road.
Oh yes, if I hadn't already pricked up my ears at the words 'lifestyle' and 'heritage', I think I just heard a dogwhistle.
Lifestyle and heritage in the territory context refer to something that is dear to the heart - in this case the so-called right to drive at any speed you want and bugger the rest of the world.
And I don't notice them lobbying for more road funding for communities - mainly Aboriginal - that are serviced by dirt roads.
There's a peculiar identity problem at the centre of this and it's called being a Territorian.
People who come here to live like to think they're different and, unfortunately, they also like to think that they shouldn't be subject to the norms of civilised behaviour, let alone the law, because they've chosen to live in what they fondly imagine to be a regulation-free environment.
So being 'Territorian' is, in the words of our home-grown political party, being 'Strong, Independent and Free'.
Wow.
Very few white people were actually born in the Northern Territory and live here for all of their adult lives.
Most of us come from the 'draconion' southern states and many only stay a couple of years, so it's a waystation on a career path rather than a serious life choice.
Quite a few of us have some sense of responsibility towards our fellow human beings.
And some of us even believe that being a resident of the NT doesn't entitle anyone to special privileges, particularly the hide to claim dangerous driving as a 'unique lifestyle and heritage'
A speed limit isn't much of a concession to make if you stand a better chance of not being hit by some junior racer who can't control a powerful car at the speeds it's engineered to do on roads that aren't designed as racetracks.
But our heavily-sponsored website has all the answers.
'NT residents who regularly drive from Alice to Darwin at anything under 120kmh complain that they get drowsy and are less alert than at the 140kmh speed that they travel at.'
Right.
I think flying is the most reasonable option.